I’ve often wondered why certain movies evince such sharp personal emotional response. Why the fictitious tragedies and melodramas wring rivers of sobbing tears from me. And tonight it became clear.

All the pain I’ve swallowed in the interest of being strong and resilient has collected over the years. I am not the type to sit and wallow, so it rests deep inside like a heavy layer of silt at the bottom of a reservoir.

I generally do not indulge in self pity or prolonged sorrow, but when I see myself mirrored in the circumstances of my buried emotions it is like someone has jumped in feet first and stirred up all the silt.

It billows up like a mushroom cloud in the water. There is an almost tangible cracking in my heart, and the damn breaks. I feel It all so fresh, and with that comes immeasurable relief.

It’s funny the way we humans trick ourselves. The way our pride can do its best to muffle reality but our mind finds a loophole to allow us to realise the things we hide so deep inside.